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After defeating teh Lich Lord in Chapter 3

"Whew! That was though!"

"though" should be changed to tough".

When Yeldin Multiplies
Riley: Is just illusion magic!
Should be: It's just illusion magic!

1)After Completing Jariel's Quest
Map - A Word of Advice

"..When you see the heart icon floating on her house in the map..
..You only have a limited amount of talk chances to use."
Imo, it's slightly repetitive to have both house and map explained,
but if you want to keep it: 'in the map' should be 'on the map'
Also, 'amount of' should be 'number of' (amount is used only with non-countable nouns)

Why not tell ouright how many chances there are to talk? :D
=> Suggestion to edit the whole block of text into this:
A Word Of Advice
Rowinda has a big bathhouse, like the one you saw in Dingirra. When you see the heart icon floating over her house, you can talk with your party members to unlock romance, friendship or special skills. You have a maximum of 10 chances to talk.

2) During Lost Brother- quest, when you find Flowervale honey in the dining room:
Jariel: It's golden bees's honey, from Flowervale. I've been there, is near an ancient elven town.
and
Jariel: No, is not normal honey at all......
correction & suggestion:
Jariel: It's honey collected from the golden bees of Flowervale. I've been there, it's near an ancient elven town.
Jariel: No, it's not normal honey at all......

1)While picking up flowers for potions:
Rowinda: Yes yes. Those yellow one are good for healing potions.
Should be:
Rowinda: Yes, yes. Those yellow ones are good for healing potions.

2) The 2nd sentence on both of the maps where you can collect stuff
First before the Centaurs (North of Shacklesplit) and then before the minotaur (Barren Lands):
"Movement
...Make sure you're ready, you don't know what dangers lies ahead!"
Should be: ....Make sure you're ready, you don't know what dangers lie ahead!

3) After winning the fight against Auris:
Main twin: Krimm, watch her. If he tries to escape, stab her.
One more escaped pronoun, should be:
Main twin: Krimm, watch her. If she tries to escape, stab her.

4) Map Barren Lands
"Set Up Camp
This looks like a good place to setup a camp and rest."
Needs a space to make it a verb: set up a camp and rest

5) Setting ambush for the minotaur, using Riley as decoy:
Minotaur: You're using magic, is not fair!
Should be 'it's not fair!' or 'that's not fair!'

6) Map: Splitpaw Pass
"Shop
This looks like a traveling merchant camp. Could it be dingirrans?"
I think this should be: 'Could it be Dingirran?'

7) After arriving safely with Daronas and Shagala to Ninim:
Riley: And if you don't mind, I'll try to find some warmer clothes. I'm even freezing inside this hut!
Word order would make more sense this way, imo:
Riley: ..... I'm freezing even inside this hut!

After finding the ratmen in their new tent, option #2:
"Hey there, is always a pleasure!"
it's always a pleasure!
(or make it even more informal by dropping the grammar: Hey there, always a pleasure! )

9) At the end, Jariel introduces everyone to you-know-who:
Jariel: This here is Riley, illusionist from Dingirra, who dared steal from the wicked Grand Mogul.."
' who dared to steal' , I believe.